Understanding Family Dynamics & Theories

Understanding Family Dynamics & Theories 

Family are all different in all sorts of ways; like size and shape. BUT every family has one thing in common, unspoken rules. Some examples of this could be unassigned assigned seats, when mom leaves the room/ house a certain individual is in charge or don`t stress mom or dad out. These rules are never said, they are taught, sometimes without knowing.  This is easier to see when a person is older and starting to make new friends. You recognize that certain people don`t like certain things. Each interaction with friends or family is so different. After getting to know them a little and learning by trial and error, how you should act and react around that person.

Every culture and family is so unique and different, no one has the same unwritten rules. In the United States, specifically in my family we were taught to listen and respect other people, especially strangers. My mom made sure that we were on our best behavior inside and outside of the house. It was never a strict situation, we were raised that way. (Some of it was because of our genes, we were all pretty shy and kind of scared of strangers). Now that I am older, I see kids disrespecting adults and being rude to strangers before they even talk to them. And that`s probably just how they were raised.

Since everyone`s families are different I think it is very hard for people to have a set plan of family dynamics. I think the few things I would suggest to parents is: to start out early, meaning if you both agree on something being a "tradition" or unspoken rule, start early in the marriage and your children's life. Be an example for the child, meaning act how you want your child to act, don`t go back on your word and even though your the adult if you want your child to do something or be somebody make sure they have an example and not to feel like they are alone. Be understanding and respectful towards your children. You should be patient and love your children, growing up isn`t easy. they have never done it before give them a break and make sure they understand what is going on. If you`re respectful to them they can learn to be respectful towards you (as a parent or other) and to other people. Raise your children how you would have wanted to have been raised.

The Family is Irreplaceable

The world has had there biggest changes in the last hundred years than any other century. The definition of the family has changed along with the world.

Up until around the 1900s the family was very traditional. Families were made up of a mother, a father and children. Now, they can be anything, like two women or two men raising children, a single mother or father raising a child. It has become less common to find a traditional family. The change in laws for the LGBTQ+ community were great but they have some long lasting, negative affects on the children involved. The children won`t be raised by both a mother and father. The relationship between a child and a mother or a child and a father is very important to not just the child but the parent as well. For example, a girl that has been raised by a single mother doesn't have that attention, time, or resources needed to protect them from the world that a father could provide. Children are proven to be healthier and more likely to get an education if they have both a mother and a father that love each other and are still married. Going along with that the parents are more motivated for their children and strive in health, wealth, and education.

Other things that drastically changed in the last hundred years is the thoughts on cohabitation, divorce, premarital sex, delayed births, delayed marriage age, birth rates, house hold size, employed mothers, etc. One hundred years ago, people were very proper. People liked a person of the opposite sex, went on chaperoned dates with them, asked them to get married and only after you were married you could live with them, have sex, and have a baby, mothers took care of the children and the father provided the money, and then they died without getting a divorce. (Unless one of the "Four As" happened. The "Four As" are Addiction, Adultery, Abuse, and Abandonment.) These days people can do any of those things in whatever order they want.

It is proven that the world society, population, economics, etc. strive on healthy traditional families.